The Auld Wife

The AULD 1 wife sat at her ivied door, (Butter and eggs and a pound of cheese) A thing she had frequently done before; And her spectacles lay on her aproned knees. The piper he piped on the hill-top high, (Butter and eggs and a pound of cheese) Till the cow said “I die” and the goose asked “Why;” And the dog said nothing but searched for fleas. The farmer he strode through the square farmyard; (Butter and eggs and a pound of cheese) His last brew of ale was a trifle hard, The connection of which with the plot one sees. The farmer’s daughter hath frank blue eyes, (Butter and eggs and a pound of cheese) She hears the rooks caw in the windy skies, As she sits at her lattice and shells her peas. The farmer’s daughter hath ripe red lips; (Butter and eggs and a pound of cheese) If you try to approach her, away she skips Over tables and chairs with apparent ease. The farmer’s daughter hath soft brown hair; (Butter and eggs and a pound of cheese) And I met with a ballad, I can’t say where, Which wholly consists of lines like these. She sat with her hands ’neath her dimpled cheeks, (Butter and eggs and a pound of cheese) And spake not a word. While a lady speaks There is hope, but she didn’t even sneeze. She sat with her hands ’neath her crimson cheeks (Butter and eggs and a pound of cheese) She gave up mending her father’s breeks, And let the cat roll in her best chemise. She sat with her hands ’neath her crimson cheeks (Butter and eggs and a pound of cheese) And gazed at the piper for thirteen weeks; Then she followed him out o’er the misty leas. Her sheep followed her as their tails did them (Butter and eggs and a pound of cheese) And this song is considered a perfect gem, And as to the meaning, it ’s what you please. Note 1. Imitation of Rossetti. [back]

Collection: 
1851
Sub Title: 
Humorous Poems: III. Parodies: Imitations

More from Poet

I Watched her as she stooped to pluck A wild flower in her hair to twine; And wished that it had been my luck To call her mine; Anon I heard her rate with mad, Mad words her babe within its cot, And felt particularly glad That it had not. I knew (such subtle brains have men...

’t Was ever thus from childhood’s hour My fondest hopes would not decay: I never loved a tree or flower Which was the first to fade away! The garden, where I used to delve Short-frocked, still yields me pinks in plenty; The pear-tree that I climbed at twelve, I see still blossoming, at...

She laid it where the sunbeams fall Unscanned upon the broken wall. Without a tear, without a groan, She laid it near a mighty stone, Which some rude swain had haply cast Thither in sport, long ages past, And time with mosses had o’erlaid, And fenced with many a tall grass-blade, And all about...

Forever! ’t is a single word! Our rude forefathers deemed it two; Can you imagine so absurd A view? Forever! What abysms of woe The word reveals, what frenzy, what Despair! For ever (printed so) Did not. It looks, ah me! how trite and tame; It fails to sadden or appall...

ON, on, my brown Arab, away, away! Thou hast trotted o’er many a mile to-day, And I trow right meagre hath been thy fare Since they roused thee at dawn from thy straw-piled lair, To tread with those echoless, unshod feet Yon weltering flats in the noontide heat, Where no palm-tree proffers a...